In the summer of 2001, my best friend, Mike Kim, took a two week trip to China that would permanently alter our lives. Mike came back and recounted horrific tales of North Koreans who  fled the famine in their country and were trapped with no help and no rights in China.

Mike quit his job, closed his affairs in America and on January 1, 2003, he was on a one-way flight to China, effectively starting Crossing Borders. This January we crossed the 19-year mark together and today, we see  20 quickly coming on the horizon. The journey has been exhilarating, heartbreaking, sanctifying and humbling. I hope these stories capture each of these complicated emotions.

Exhilarating

Few things feel better than helping someone in dire need. Over the years, Crossing Borders has helped thousands of North Korean refugees, their children and families in China and in South Korea. So many people in need of help were in pretty woeful situations.

 “Susanna” was blind from cataracts and her husband, who purchased her, would not pay for the procedure to allow her to see again. In a twisted way, her husband and his family liked that she could not see because she was less likely to flee. Through her friends in the Crossing Borders network, she received the help she needed to receive surgery. Her eyesight was restored and literally leapt for joy when she saw our missionaries again. You can read more about her story here.

Heartbreaking 

Despite the love we have poured on the refugees and orphans in our network, some have had difficulties accepting this love. Sometimes we have not shown the patience and compassion this task requires. Other times, we did not hold our staff to a high enough standard. This work is complicated and difficult.

One story comes to mind about an orphan who lived in one of our group homes. According to his caretakers, he was addicted to his phone and was getting into trouble in and out of school. The caretakers came down hard on this young man. He was about 15 years old at the time. Their acts of discipline drove him to run away.

I think about this child from time to time. I think about his future with no parents to care for him and now, no other support. I think about his influences. I think about his fate. I wish there was a better way that we could have engaged with him. I wish we could say that 100 percent of the people in our network went on to live stable, happy and Godly lives. But we live in a fallen world and we know this is not the case. Each heartbreaking situation causes us to evaluate our approach so we can learn and improve for the next encounter.

Sanctifying 

Because this work is so difficult, it has forced me to pray. I have to confess, it is difficult for me to pray on my own and I have lost this battle in my life more often than I’d like to admit. But this work has brought me to unabashedly cry out to the Lord for help. Whether it be about North Korean refugees in peril or from my personal brushes with the law in China, this work has become God’s grace to me. My faith has been stretched and grown through this work, and the work through faith. What an amazing journey! 

Humbling 

My professional background is in journalism. I do not have the training to run an organization, let alone a Christian nonprofit. I also did not go to seminary. Mike and I started this organization when we were 26 years old. No undergrad poetry class at the University of Illinois prepared me to start, support and run a US-based nonprofit organization that helps people on the other side of the world.

Despite all that was foreign to me and the factors that seemed like shortcomings, God has used them to keep my knees planted on the ground. As he has grown our organization in recent years, I always remember our humble beginnings and the simple focus we had, which continues to this day.

I have encountered hundreds of North Korean refugees and have shared countless hours together with them. One thing I can say across the board is that North Korea has taken something from them. We all have wounds from life but for North Koreans, their wounds are more acute and deeply scarring. The first story I heard about a refugee’s life sparked a fire in me and this passion has fueled the past 19 years of service.

I am humbled to be entrusted with this work to this day. It has been the privilege of my life to pursue this as my vocation. Thank you for your support and prayers. May the Lord continue to show his blessings to us in our 20th year!