How Ellie (엘리) Found Refuge #GivingTuesday2023
In the fall of 2022 we welcomed another refugee into Elim House. We call her “Ellie.” Ellie moved to South Korea in 2005 and scratched out a living as a restaurant worker. Her husband became abusive as a result of a mental illness, according to Ellie. She was so miserable that she attempted suicide. Finally, she asked around if there was any other place for her to live.
“I don’t want to divorce him. I just need a break,” she told our staff when she first arrived at our women’s shelter. Elim House was the resting place she needed. According to Ellie, her husband had psychological problems and was delusional. She also shared that her husband’s brother had severe mental health issues, which was the cause of his death in North Korea.
As a part of the daily rhythms at Elim House, Ellie began doing Bible studies with our social workers. Ellie’s curiosity about Christianity grew and she even wondered why she didn’t consider the Bible more seriously in the past. Her daughter had previously become a Christian and Ellie was exposed to Christianity but was not convinced.
After spending three months at Elim House and receiving counseling, Ellie’s heart softened. She said that Elim House is like going to her mother’s home, a place where she felt safe. During the week, she would read the Bible with our social worker. She was fascinated by the book of Proverbs and said that it felt like every line was written for her. One Sunday she decided that she wanted to follow Christ and that she wanted to be baptized.
North Koreans like Ellie carry with them a tremendous amount of trauma from their difficult lives in South Korea but also from their time in China, where most have been sold, and their time in North Korea. Ellie carried this trauma into Elim House.
She shared a story about a public execution she saw in person. Often, public executions in North Korea were mandatory viewing. One man was caught with a Bible. Later, a cross was found hanging in his basement. The man’s last words were, "God saved me, not Kim Il Sung.” He barely got his last words out before he was shot dead.
The temporary separation from his wife made Ellie’s husband reconsider how he had treated her. She told us that he was willing to do anything to have her back, even go to counseling. She decided to give their marriage another try. And through most of 2023, it seemed as if they were doing well.
Ellie attended our summer retreat and her life seemed stable. When she came back in September for our Chuseok retreat,it was then that we saw the weight of her marriage on her. She was sad and broken. Shortly after the retreat, Ellie told our social worker that her husband asked for a divorce. She longed for the days when she lived at Elim House and has even considered moving back temporarily.
She is currently going through the legal process of divorce in South Korea. She and her husband are dividing up their assets and her heart is broken. Elim House was a short time in Ellie’s life. It became a place of rest for her amidst the tumult of her life. But most importantly, it was a place where she had a true encounter with the Lord. Though she came to find temporary refuge from her difficult marriage, she found her true refuge in God. Though the circumstances of her life are materially no different from when she first came through our doors, the radical transformation God did in her heart will carry her through the difficulties of her divorce.
This holiday season, please consider making a contribution to this work. Not only will you be providing physical refuge, you will also be providing a platform to share about spiritual refuge in Christ.