Andrea (right) celebrating a birthday at Elim House.
One day in China where Andrea lived as a North Korean in hiding for seven years, Andrea dropped off her six-year-old daughter at school. She then got in touch with a broker she knew, without any intention of leaving the country, but she somehow found herself in Laos soon thereafter, from where she eventually made her way to South Korea. That was nine years ago.
This is how Andrea recounted her journey from China to South Korea to us when she entered Elim House in December of 2024. The sparse details, seemingly random actions and the surprising results of her actions were very much indicative of how she lived every day before her arrival at Elim House.
While initially she was able to make good money as a golf caddie in South Korea, her health deteriorated and she was not able to maintain a steady job. Bouncing from one odd job to the next, she sank further and further into debt as she could not keep up with her monthly bills. The dire situation only contributed to her high levels of anxiety and she was ultimately referred to our shelter for rest and for a chance to reset herself.
Andrea says that staying at Elim House has given her time to breathe and a peace of mind that she was not able to feel before. She experienced a lot of anxiety every month as she worried about paying her rent and having food and shelter, but since staying with us, she has not had to worry about these things. At Elim House, she can eat without worrying and sleep to her heart’s content.
When asked what the one thing was that she wanted to work on during her time with us, she stated that she wanted to work on not being so anxious. She also openly admitted that the hardest part about living in Elim House was trying to get along with and match the preferences of the other residents in our shelter.
With the encouragement of our social workers, Andrea underwent a series of psychiatric tests recently which revealed a shocking array of underlying issues: At age 36, Andrea was diagnosed with severe depression, high levels of anxiety and fear, early-stage dementia, symptoms of forgetfulness and memory loss, adult ADHD and high levels of victimization. She revealed that she has attempted suicide two times since coming to South Korea.
We are grateful for each day we have with Andrea and that God has allowed our lives to intersect at this moment in time. Andrea willingly opens the Bible daily with our social workers and for the first time in her life, she has the time and space to introspectively think. Examining the book of Proverbs these days, Andrea has made amazingly inward-looking comments about herself and others. After reading Proverbs 16:27 (“A worthless man plots evil, and his speech is like a scorching fire”), Andrea said that she is starting to see her problem of blaming others for issues that take root in her own faults. While reading Proverbs 13:1 (“A wise son hears his father’s instruction, but a scoffer does not listen to rebuke”), she said that up until now, she always made decisions on her own without asking anyone for advice or help, but she is starting to see the importance of listening to what others might have to say to her.
Andrea has also started to regularly attend our Elim Community line dancing classes, where she has the opportunity to find community with other North Korean refugees, which contributes to the overall process of dealing with her trauma.. Most recently, she agreed to receive regularly occurring counseling sessions from therapists in our network.
The daughter she left behind in China is now a 15-year-old teenager who no longer answers her phone calls. Andrea often wonders what life would have been like had she stayed in China.
